I remember THAT day.
There was a day that I WOKE up. I decided that day that something needed to change.
How life had been was no longer acceptable.
How did I even get here? It was like I woke up from a dream. A bad dream. A dream that was negatively impacting my life for a longer chunk of time than I care to acknowledge. I am not even sure exactly when it all started.
I remember some of the beginnings of my downward spiral. I remember that there was a lot of headache and heart ache. I remember that I had broken down. I struggled emotionally. I suffered mentally. And physically, I had ailments and aches and exhaustion. It was rough.
My health was struggling in all ways. As a result, so was my marriage. And my family. Relationships with friends and my lack of engagement with my faith. I did not feel joy in my job or my family or in life. I was miserable.
When I took a hard look at where I was at, I was able to see all the areas that I was suffering in. My heart was aching for joy and fun and reconnecting with my family and ME. I had lost who I was in my suffering. I had to make a decision.
And I did.
THIS day I decided that I would focus on gratitude and faith. My faith was a central piece of my life and I let it become a faint, nearly non-existent part of me. In that, I lost my gratitude and my hope. I was able to see that despite the hard of the past few years, I still had my family. My husband. Some of my health. A job I love. I needed to improve these connections, but I HAD many things to be grateful for. I needed to take time and be appreciative to regain perspective of what I have and who I am that is still here!