Burnout. (And lessons learned)

Burnout. (And lessons learned)
Recently, I was overtaken by burnout.

Have you ever experienced burnout? It is a form of stress... but greater. It used to be recognized only in the workplace as basically being worked too hard but now we recognize it more in the every day. I suppose that is our busy culture and especially with it being seen more and more with working moms. 

You know those statistics that talk about the job of a mom being equivalent to 2.5 full time jobs? I am not sure what the most recent stats say but you know what I am talking about. Well- it is no wonder we are seeing more burnout in moms and especially working (outside the home) moms. 

That applies to me as well.... Full time working mom, homeschooling and mom/home life.  

It was only a few short weeks ago that I felt fine. Then... I wasn't

It was like all the stresses of all the things hit me at once. The clients that I work with, the stressors in home with the busy and the start of the school year, schedules changing, miscommunication with the husband and the upcoming anniversary of my mom's passing. Whew. While I was searching for some relaxation, it seemed that was impossible, creating more stress. No relief seemed to show up and the stresses kept coming. I felt myself coming to a breaking point. A realization that the current standard needs to change. Or at least shift. Somehow. Some way. 


(the big unknown)

Luckily, I was able to take a week off to decompress and try to regroup. It was nothing like what I desired my time off to look like, as it was desired to be filled with lots of self-care time and personal time, but I had a couple very important lessons in this time off. 

Burnout really equates to an issue with 2 things: boundaries AND self care

Talk about the perfect recipe for burnout

For me, my boundaries were around my self care. Or lack of. A huge realization that I need to better protect my self care and personal time and set better boundaries to take care of me. Because, well, honestly no one was very happy in my house the past couple weeks. The saying is (sadly) true: If momma ain't happy, no one is happy.

Not that it should always be that way but it was for this chunk of time. When one person is suffering in the family, everyone else takes note. We all suffer. It is the ripple effect. 

The second lesson that I learned during this time off was that I did not want to work with certain people or do certain things. I think I knew that before but I felt the frustration rise up in a deeper, more distinct way during this time off. It became very clear to me how I need to better communicate my needs and wants as well as better identifying my ideal client to move forward more positively with pursuing my new direction with my coaching business. 

 I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason

Dreams, people, circumstances are all opportunities to teach us something. They are opportunities to look deeper or help us expand or grow in various ways in our lives. Whether in our thinking or actions, relationships, ideas, business, health... you get the idea. So, this time of struggle was a time of much needed reflection. An opportunity to reflect on these areas that were already out of balance but perhaps, I did not recognize they were impacting me as they were. Sometimes it is that HARD reality check that is necessary to help us take the time to take a deeper look. 

So, while burnout and stress are not exactly fun, they are helpful ways for us to slow down and take a deeper look at what is happening and make the changes that we did not know we needed. Or maybe we did know, but did not take the steps before. Either way, progress.

Have you dealt with burnout? Tell me what you learned in your experience. <3

No Drama-Llama

Do you ever have drama in YOUR family?? I would not be surprised- there seems to always be that ONE person at least that seems to create some shift in the family dynamics. Well, my family is not any different. I have two brothers, both older than me, but sometimes you might not know it. My one brother seems to be the drama-loving one. He is charming and funny and has a great personality. He can be a really nice guy- but he tends to be the one who also knows how to manipulate or create the drama in my family of origin. The drama-llama. 

Recently, I had to travel to take care of some family property. The drama came unexpectedly. Well, it was in some ways expected. Just drama never is what you anticipate. I won't go into my family dealings here but I say this to point out that drama and ultimately the STRESS of the situation was quite large. Disappointing. Hurtful. 

Luckily it is not in my nature to retaliate with negativity but I always attempt to reach out in love. Setting boundaries and responding with love takes a lot of practice but I have had a lot of opportunities in my life to practice being firm but loving. I admit that I am not always flawless in this area, but I certainly know that I need to step back, out of the negativity and be thoughtful about my response. Oh, and ALLLLLLL the oils. Yes. 

The oils that have helped me in times of stress to support my emotions and my body systems are super important. I had my grief roller ball with me on this trip, as well as Valor, which is not only a powerful oil (and also called the "unicorn oil") but the definition of Valor is "great courage in the face of danger, especially in battle." Do you also think WARRIOR??? Man. 

Valor supports the body by promoting feelings of strength, helping the body be in balance, empowers self-confidence, and is emotionally balancing, supporting the body with ANXIETY, DEPRESSION, EMOTIONAL TRAUMA and ANGER, as well as being helpful with calming properties, reducing tension headaches and joint pain. This oil is a great one to bring to your chiropractic or massage appointment! Not to mention the other cool properties, like it reportedly helps relieves snoring (any one struggling with their husband in this area????) and aids in focus and attention.
Millions of US children have been diagnosed with ADHD: 
  • The estimated number of children ever diagnosed with ADHD, according to a national 2016 parent survey,is 6.1 million (9.4%). This number includes:
    • 388,000 children aged 2–5 years
    • 4 million children aged 6–11 years
    • 3 million children aged 12–17 years

Valor has 4 main oils in it: 
-Rosewood which purifies and supports a healthy immune system. It is emotionally grounding. 
-Spruce which opens and releases emotional blocks
-Blue Tansy which supports healthy muscular and lymphatic systems as well as combating anger. 
-Frankincense stimulates the limbic part of the brain, elevating the mind and overcoming occasional stress and despair. 

Does this oil seem to you that EVERYONE could benefit from this special oil?? 

Valor is amazing. It is one of my FAVORITES! It is a blue oil and you can tell that is is special. Can you see why? Now if only we can send the drama-llamas to bath in Valor....